I’m half way through my time here- I actually can’t believe that. It’s that strange time warp I mentioned a while ago- despite my feelings of complete comfort and at-homeness here, it’s hard to accept that it has already been a full three months since I arrived. Especially since I started my internship, time has been flying. Because I’m at this midway point, I thought it’d be a good time to reflect a little bit. Also, we have another student staying in my homestay for this week and seeing her first uncomfortable days here has really made me realize just how much has changed in these three months.

At first, I wrote out another really long blog post (3 single spaced pages…), but I said many weeks ago that I would try to make these a manageable reading length. So, here are two of the biggest things I want to think about again from the past three months:

• Starting with the most obvious: language. This girl who is in our house this week doesn’t know any Spanish, and seeing her totally lost at dinner or when Dixia is trying to explain something to her throws me so hard back to my first week here. The days of smiling and nodding, wanting so badly to just be able to express myself. The days where my dictionary was literally glued to my hand so I could have some semblance of understanding (of at least a word or two). The days when I used to essentially write out scripts of what I wanted to say and read directly from my notebook when I had something to say. The days where I would spend my whole walk home from school trying to plan out how I was going to explain my day to my family. Writing it out now, I didn’t even realize that each of these things was just a gradual showing of my growing language abilities. It grew to the point where I would just plan things in my head fully before I would say them to now, when I can talk without having to go through the barrier of English to Spanish translation in my mind. To now, when Spanish comes kind of naturally (surely still full of errors) and when I sometimes find it more difficult to think in English than in Spanish, when words want to come out in Spanish before thinking of coming out in English. I’ve still got a lot more to learn, but seeing myself juxtaposed with my three-months-ago self through this other girl here- I find it kind of incredible how drastically modes of conversation can change when they don’t have the option of remaining stagnant.
•  I’m straddling this strange place I’ll call (in)dependence. I say this because this experience has simultaneously been the most on-my-own and difficult I’ve had, but at the same time one of the most comfortable and provided-for. On the independence side: I’ve gotten over my fears of confronting strangers (asking questions, for directions, making phone calls and reservations). I’ve worked on integrating myself into a completely unknown environment. This is the longest I’ve ever gone without seeing my family. I’ve become a lot more self-dependent in my reflection of things (relying very heavily on my journal!), since I don’t really have any close friends here and can’t totally express myself in Spanish. I just generally feel so much more confident in so many aspects of my life- it’s not really anything I can put into good words for you. Then for dependence, I live with the most wonderful host family who provides me with a very comfortable place to live, food every meal of the day (and more), laundry, patience for language, and seemingly unending open arms. Since I have two younger sisters, I feel almost like I’ve been thrown into the mix of being a kid- feeling as through I need to be home by dinner every night, can’t go out after dark on my own, and have to report my whereabouts and plans every day. I think a lot of this is my thinking and not the expectations of my host parents, but they’re still there. It’s interesting that it’s possible to have two such polar experiences at the same time, within the same places.
  

I’ll leave it at that for now! I know you’ve all got things to be doing, and I’ve gotta go home and pack! We just finished up our last day of school for this quarter, and now have two weeks off. SPRING BREAK! Early tomorrow morning, I’m heading to Nicaragua for a week to renew my Costa Rican visa, then I’m coming back to CR to meet my host family at the beach for a few days. For the rest of the second week off, I’m (hopefully) going to hike up Mt. Chirripó with another intern. It’s the highest peak in CR (3,820 meters) and the second highest in Central America and it’s supposed to have incredible views of both coasts, unbelievable sunrises, and all sorts of glacial lakes and other natural beauty. They only take forty visitors a day and the spots fill up fast and far in advance… fingers crossed we can somehow get out hands on two passes! If not, it will be an adventure to see where we can get to by bus from there!

I hope you’ve all got fun things ahead of you, too! I’ll be thinking about you lots over these two weeks, as I probably won’t have much access to Internet to talk with you (don’t worry, Mom, I’ll definitely seek out internet cafes to send you quick updates!).

<3

That is a line from the school song, which I often have stuck in my head because it makes a weekly appearance at school sing on Fridays. The song is in a mix of Spanish and English, with tons of great lines like “Look all around, if you can’t find me then look up here, get me out of this tree!” and the above, which means “How lucky I am to be able to learn here!” - all of which totally define the culture of this school. I definitely have my criticisms of the school (good old Swat teaching me to be critical of everything), but I’m a huge supporter of the school’s underlying values and traditions, which I’ll get into later.

So far, I’ve really been enjoying learning about and becoming a part of the really strong community that is this school. Again, I feel like I’m repeating myself in every update I give: I’m constantly feeling more and more comfortable and in place, first with Spanish, then with being on my own, with my family, and in Costa Rica in general. But I will say it again, because it continues to be true and, after a month and then some with my class, I’m now able to add my time at the CEC to my list of new normalcies (if that’s even a real word?).

If I were to write this blog post last week, I would talk a lot about how I’m slowly gaining responsibilities and gradually feeling more and more comfortable working with students in small groups, trying to pick up on and address the different learning stages and styles of my students. How I’m still really hesitant to do things in front of the whole class, because that is such an intimidating idea- to be largely in charge of the learning and development of fifteen kids? Talk about responsibility!

But, this week took some unexpected turns. As I was getting ready for school on Monday morning, I got a call from Jesse, the school director. Beverly had been sick all weekend- would I be okay taking lead of the class? (The school doesn’t have a budget or the resources for substitute teachers, so a teacher absence often causes lots of flip flopping of job responsibilities.) “Umm… I guess so?” was my response. This was surely a change from my as-of-then role in the classroom, where the most I did was work with small groups and lead a read aloud or two. It was actually kind of ironic, because the Friday before, Beverly and I had a conversation about how I could establish myself as more of an authority figure in the classroom- like gradually taking over morning meeting. Now, here I am, fumbling to play lead teacher of the class (I guess immersion is the best way to learn…?)

Let me just say, I was nervous heading to school on the bus that morning. I’ve been thinking recently a bit about how it’s kind of funny that I’ve wanted to be a teacher for basically my whole life, when I really dislike being in front of crowds and most forms of public presentation. But anyway, thankfully Jesse was able to switch around his schedule and be with me in class for most of the day on Monday. That put me a bit more at ease with the classroom/behavior management aspect of teaching, which is something I haven’t dealt with very much until this week.

I suppose day went pretty smoothly, considering that it poured all day so all the energy the kids usually expend during their hour plus of recess remained pent up in the classroom. On top of that, they were definitely testing the waters to see what they could get away with having me in charge of the class. I ended the day exhausted and really doubting whether or not teaching is what I want to pursue… which didn’t make me feel too good, since this has been my dream job ever since I was old enough to conceive of one. To be honest, these doubts have been in the back of my mind the whole month I’ve been at the school. I’ve spent so much time in my classes at Swarthmore constructing my idea of my ideal classroom and teacher—and my time here has been proving to me just how hard it is to put those ideals into practice. I’ve been countering my doubts, though, by telling myself to stay patient- nobody walks into teaching and works miracles. It takes a LOT of time- struggles, failures, good and bad days.

Thankfully, I’ve already been able to see loads of improvement! It turns out Beverly would be sick for the whole week. Since Jesse had to get back to his regular job at the school, I was left the rest of the week actually in charge. My nerves resided with each day. I won’t give a full recap of it all, because that would take forevaaaa, but I will point out some things:

• I have been learning so much about flexibility and doing things on the fly, something I don’t consider myself especially skilled at, especially when it includes some form of public presentation. It a lot of fun to see where unplanned class discussions can go- I’m always totally blown away by all the interesting things these students have to say!
• It’s amazing how supportive some students are and how some of them are able to realize and acknowledge the fact that this is very new and difficult for me. I’ve gotten a bunch of drawings and notes saying things like “You are doing so great on your own!” (actually: “Yuo do grate ahlon!”) and offers to help me get the class to be quiet.
• Kids really see their teachers as having all the solutions- to a tricky math problem, to social problems at recess (“He wouldn’t play in the tree with me!”), to stomach/tooth/anything aches. It’s such a multi-faceted role as a sharer of knowledge, listener, mother, nurse, cheerleader, and (my least favorite part) disciplinarian.
• There’s something really fulfilling about finishing a day of teaching. I can’t put my finger on any specific part that makes it feel this way, but I know that, regardless of how frustrating or tiring it may be, it makes me really happy. That’s got to mean something for my potential future as a teacher, right? It’s sure done a lot to help me ease my doubts as to whether my whole life vision is totally off!
  

For these reasons and so many more, I am incredibly happy that this opportunity arose. If I had been asked if I wanted to take complete lead of the class for a week, I would have said noooo way. But, I didn’t really have a choice! So truly, “¡Que dicha que puedo aprender así!” Here, I’m seeing and being a part of the ins and outs of teaching. Though this school is a really unique one, making the experience I have here probably different than others I will have in the future, it is really beginning to help me establish what I think education and teaching and behavior management are in practice. I’ve read and talked and learned so much about them in theory, I’m so now thankful to have that be shifting on the scale towards application. I really couldn’t think of a more fun or useful way to spend the semester!

But now, aside from these great, incredibly practical experiences I’m getting here, I’ll tell you a little bit about the school itself.

The type of education the kids receive here is so along the lines of what I imagine and want education to be everywhere. Teachers have seemingly endless flexibility with what they do, enabling them to make sure it is accessible to all the different learning styles of each student. So much of the learning is based on student learning paces and hands-on, creative activities. For Leap Day, for example, Beverly and I were able to take the whole day to plan activities that weren't necessarily in line with the current point in the curriculum, but that taught about the day and also was a celebration. Also, for Ana Yeris' birthday, her mom brought in arroz con pollo, juice, cake, and goodie bags. She came during writing workshop, but we stopped class and had a birthday celebration. Afterwards, we still had thirty minutes before recess was supposed to start, but instead of trying to squeeze in the rest of the writing lesson, we were able to let them have extra recess time- what they really needed after getting hopped up on sugar and birthday excitement.

The underlying beliefs of the school enable these types of serendipitous things to happen all the time. The CEC’s three main objectives are:

• “To discover and address the intellectual, emotional, physical, and spiritual needs of each child in order to stimulate their creativity, natural love for learning, and sense of wonder about the world around them.
• To provide a strong interdisciplinary curriculum that incorporates environmental education in every way possible.
• To inspire and educate students to be caring, develop a strong sense of community and take an active interest in conservation and sustainability with a desire to contribute from local to global levels.”
  

How could I not agree with all of that?? It totally encompasses all of the values and ideas I hold about education; it’s basically everything I would want a school to be. Of course, there’s a difference between what is written on paper and what takes place in practice. For instance, the environmental education component is nowhere near as strong as these objectives make it seem. But, from what I’ve been involved with in the second grade, a focus on the individuality of the student and supporting them to learn at their own pace is huge. There is essentially no (visible) focus on standardized testing or official benchmarks- enabling a lot more flexibility for the teachers (except in 11th grade, when the students have to prepare for a national exit exam. Since it’s in Spanish and they have spent the past many years learning and being tested in English, much of this last year of colegio is spent cramming Spanish). So much of the learning is project-based and utilizes the incredible outdoor resources available here. I’m not quite sure how to describe it, but the experiences here just seems so much more whole and integrated than those of any other school I’ve been in (and that could just be because this is the first school placement I’ve been at all day, every day). It’s definitely a special place.

But, encompassed in the goodness of this unique school culture also are some things that make me a little uneasy:

There is a ridiculously high rate of teacher turnover at this school. Next year, for instance, about half of the entire school staff (faculty and administration) will change. The majority of the staff is foreign- most come to work at the school only for a few years, then return back to the States to find a more permanent job. Or, some people come with the intention of staying longer, but it just turns out to be unfeasibly financially (the school runs entirely on donations and gives out a ton of student scholarships, so staff salaries are very low). On top of that, volunteers and interns are constantly coming and going- for a week to a semester at a time. One of my biggest apprehensions going into this internship was the fact that I was joining this culture of inconsistency.

Nobody I’ve met or read in the world of education really thinks high turnover is a good thing. It makes developing a strong and stable school culture pretty hard, since the people composing it are changing every year or two. How does this impact the cohesion of a teaching and administrative group? From what I’ve seen here, there seems to be a really clear divide between the foreign teachers and the local teachers (many of whom who have been here for five to ten years). Whether this is directly attributable to the inconsistency of the foreign staff from year to year, I can’t say. I’m sure language differences have a lot to do with it as well, as many of the foreign teachers come here with no Spanish.

Also, high turnover can bring a lot of trial and error- as soon as a teacher or administrator is getting the hang of the job in this unique context, they are being replaced by someone else and the process has to begin again. How does this impact the quality of the education the students receive? Also, how does this forever coming and going of people impact their image of schooling? It’s something they’re expected to stick with through all the grades, yet they see their educators doing just the opposite.

I had a conversation with Beverly about this, where she pointed out a really interesting thing about the turnover. While she doesn’t think it’s a good thing, it could have one major benefit: the labels of “good class”/”bad class”/”hard worker”/”trouble-maker” that are so often assigned to and limit the potential of classes and individual students won’t necessarily get passed on from year to year. As new teachers come in, they accept their class with no predeterminations about how they are. Beverly gave me the example of how a class that years ago was considered to be the worst class at the school is now seen as one of the hardest-working and most well-behaved. Students mesh better with some teacher personalities and the turnover allows for ever-changing student-teacher relationships and “wiping of the slate” of student labeling. So, it might not be entirely bad. Plus, I think every school has its weaknesses, after all!

Despite these criticisms, I am still very thankful to be having all of these experiences here. I just can't help but thinking about how happy it is to be here- at the CEC and in Monteverde in general. I feel like I'm constantly living in a state of disbelief that this is my life right now, but also at the same time a sense that this is totally normal and natural. Other than missing my family and friends, this place has everything I'm looking for-- nature, hiking, walking, the feria, calm, free time, school, kids, and if I get my act together- doing ceramics with some local artists! Plus, how great is it that I’m getting so much practical teaching experience?!

Anyway, I will stop talking now. Haha thanks if you made it all the way through this novel! Hope everyone is well! <3

Just when I think things here are already so stellar, they get even better. I am LOVING pretty much everything about my time here. For one, I’m really starting to feel a part of my class at the CEC, rather than just some new outsider- I’ll get more into my time there later (I’ve got to save it for the end/maybe another post, or else I’ll never talk about anything else…). So before that, some highlights from the past twoish weeks:

• I got to Skype with my whole family two weekends ago! Though it was sad to be the one so far away, it was great to be able to catch up with everyone all at once and feel almost like I was right there with them. Also, it was a happy feeling to know that, while I wish I could have transported myself to Connecticut to be with them more than anything, I wasn’t totally homesick afterwards, rather just really happy to have such an incredible family.
• I had my first ever banana split (fresh Costa Rican banana + local Monteverde ice cream = how am I going to prevent myself from getting one of these every day??)
• It’s mango season and this one farmer at the feria sells the best mangos I have ever, ever eaten. Basically, anything to do with fruit here is INCREDIBLE.
•  All of the interns went on a horseback-riding trip together last weekend. It was one of the most beautiful days I’ve had (Monteverde continues to blow me away with its mountains- forested and country-, startling greenness, electric blue skies, and cottony clouds that move faster than any I’ve seen before). The whole experience is kind of dream like, actually, and that’s how it felt as it was happening too. It was the most blue and clear day and we went on a fortyish minute ride through this family’s land to a hidden river, where we got to swim for a few hours in the fresh spring water. After, we rode our horses back to their house, where the family had made corn bread and juice for us. 
• Last Sunday, my abuela got a new washing machine, which was exciting for her. What was exciting for my two sisters and me is that it came in a GIANT cardboard box, which we commandeered for the night (and I guess eternally). We spent the night playing games inside this box like it was a fort, and then we actually made it into a fort by decorating the inside with drawings of trees and mountains. It was such a simple thing, but such a blast and, since that night, I feel like Alejandra and Angelica are actually my sisters- playing pretend and all these crazy kid games somehow brought us so much closer together! Also, as a funny side note, I spent all of Sunday babysitting my sisters while Dixia and Geovanny were at a party, and that included me walking them into town to get ice cream and helping them clean up the house. That night, after Dixia and I had made dinner and cleaned up, she told me that she officially deems me ready to have kids because I’m such a “motherly person.” I assured her I will be waiting many years before even thinking about that, haha but it’s good to know I have the okay of this woman I so admire (especially as a mother). 
• It’s a Leap Year!! Which was really fun in second grade. I made up a whole ton of themed activities to do for the day, like lily pad math, where my class literally jumped like frogs from lily pad to lily pad to solve the math problems written on them. We also wrote about what life might be like in one/two/five/ten/thirty leap years (watch out, there are flying cars, robot houses coming up, and a whole slew of new rock stars and singers coming up…). Then, we made frogs out of paper bags. I will probably be saying this over and over, but it’s incredible to be at a school where there is enough flexibility to be able to dedicate entire days to celebrations like this, with no pressures or worries of falling behind schedule or deviating from the curriculum. 
• Since the sun sets here like clockwork at six, I get to walk into the sunset every night on my way home from school. 
• I went back to the waterfall in San Luis with a bunch of the other interns this weekend. It was a beautiful hike there and it was great to spend time with the interns, since we don’t see much of each other during the week. After the tiring but beautiful-so-you-can’t-help-but-smiling-and-feeling-at-ease hike, we hung out by the waterfall for a few hours, eating our lunches, swimming, and just talking. To make the already fantastic day even better, Lisa suggested we go to Sabores, one of the ice cream shops in town. With no plans to do anything that afternoon and a strong love for ice cream, I decided to go along. As Lisa, Amanda, and I were ordering, the owner/manager (?) of the shop came over to us with two giant plates- chocolate and vanilla Belgian waffles with ice cream. She had just been taking pictures of the newest addition to their menu to make some posters… could we maybe help her out? She didn’t want to throw them out, and she also wanted to know how the waffles were because they aren’t exactly a common Costa Rican food. Amanda had already ordered a cinnamon bun literally the size of my whole hand, but of course we couldn’t refuse! We spent the next hour in a giddy high, both from sugar and disbelief about our luck to be there in time to get free waffles and ice cream!
• Sundays, which used to be my least favorite day of the week because they’re so slow and I often just got really bored and lonely, are getting better and better as time goes on. This Sunday, I spent the whole morning lying outside with Alejandra watching butterflies hatch, which is such a stunning thing to see. We also played hide and seek, Frisbee, and catch with water balloons and made friendship bracelets (finally used what you sent me, Mom!). Being a big sister is fun, but it takes up so much energy (haha Jen, how did you do it with me??)! But, it’s a good thing we did so many things because the rest of the day was pretty much spent eating (which, I’ve realized, is what happens on Sundays here). We had a kind of cookout for lunch, with veggie kabobs, tortillas, beets, plantains, and salad, all cooked in the outdoor kitchen. It felt so much like a summer family holiday day; it was a ton of fun to just hang around and talk and joke with Dixia and my sisters. Then, for an afternoon snack, Dixia made arroz con leche. THEN for dinner we made sushi and tempura, Costa Rican style. It was typical veggie sushi, with carrots, cucumber, and avocado… wrapped in cooked plantains, dipped in tempura batter, and fried. Dixia used to work in this sushi restaurant that is in Santa Elena, so she’s got all sorts of tricks up her sleeve. Not only was it a blast to cook this with her, but it was DELICIOUS too!
• To balance out all the eating that has been happening, running became a lot more fun when I realized that I can go on school grounds in the afternoon, rather than on the rocky, dusty roads near my house. Running in over 100 acres of a private cloud forest reserve is pretty spectacular…
• Beverly has been out sick all week so far, and will be for the rest of the week. So, I have been thrown intot the full role of a teacher. It's definitely been a struggle, but I think a really, really good thing. More on
  

As is probably evident in my excessive use of the words beautiful, amazing, so, very, and happy and the fact that I end every post with a similar sentiment: I’m just falling more in love with Monteverde the more time I spend here. I repeat these things because they’re true! Also, it seems like my ability to form eloquent sentences in English is declining, and I haven’t quite reached the point of eloquence in Spanish yet, meaning I’m sometimes a little stuck haha. So: I’m just so very happy to be in this beautiful, amazing place. I sometimes still wake up for look around as I’m walking and feel myself questioning whether or not this is just a dream. I can’t shake my feelings of luck and good fortune, mostly thanks to all who have helped me get to this point.

Sending love to you everyone! Especially to the Ryan/Colonnese/Nazzaro clan <3 As much as I love it here, I wish right now that I could be with you guys. I hope you can feel me hugging you and sending all my loving and positive thoughts in your ways as you read this.

So, I meant to write this post a few weeks ago, after I’d been here for a month, as a kind of reflection on how the transition has been. But, despite my ample free time, especially in the week between the end of my classes at CPI and the start of my internship at the CEC, it just didn’t seem to get done! As a result, I’ve kind of been dreading writing it because so much has changed since my last post and it’s a lot to wrap my head around for one message. Also, this means I am fully revoking my promise to make my posts shorter… but here it goes!

Towards the end of January, I finished my classes at CPI. I was actually really sad about this- I was enjoying not only learning Spanish, but also getting to have a ton of really interesting discussions with my teachers there. I’m so thankful for my time there, because I got to learn so much about the culture here and hear so many different opinions about education, gardening, tourism, healthy eating, equality, and so many other topics from all of the teachers I got to work with. Plus, of course, I learned so much vocabulary for things that are important to me, along with all the necessary grammar! I think my month of classes there was the perfect way for me to transition into my time in Costa Rica.

The week after I finished at CPI was low-key, to say the least. I had six whole days to myself, alone, with very little to do (solo-traveling didn’t seem like a very appealing option for me). Looking back on it, I guess it was a good time for me to relax and plan a little bit for my summer, but in the midst of the week, I couldn’t help but wishing I had productive things to do, or at least some people to pass the time with… I found myself wallowing a bit in homesickness and a good dose of loneliness and boredom. I wish I had been more proactive in going out of my way to meet new people or seeing new things, but this week really proved to me that I’m not all that comfortable or interested in going out and doing new things on my own. On the bright side, I ended up reading more books for fun than I have in a long while (thank goodness there’s such a wonderful library here!) and went on some long walks and runs. I also got to spend some time with Dixia when she wasn’t at work. We cleaned, talked about our families, and baked (we made banana bread and homemade peanut butterrr, among many other things).

After it’s solo, low-key beginnings, the week ended on a really positive and exciting note! Recharged after receiving a wonderful care package from my mom (thank you!!), I finally got to start at the CEC on Friday the 27th! We had an intern orientation, so throughout the day, we got a tour of the school, meet all the other interns, and spent a bit of time in our classrooms. To start the day off, we attended school sing, a weekly CEC tradition where different grades take turns performing songs for the rest of the school. As soon as I got there, I was bombarded by a horde of second-grade girls wanting to sit on my lap, hold my hand, and know all about my life. Their energy and excitement didn’t subside when I went to their classroom a bit later in the day to introduce myself; we all sat in a circle and they asked me all sorts of questions about my life. It was a great introduction to a class I am quickly coming to love.

The first official week of my internship was spent mainly getting to know the schedule and flow of the class- and of course learning names! On Monday, we took a hike in the school’s forest (over 100 acres!) to the Kiosko, a gazebo built a few years ago overlooking the school, Santa Elena, and Cañitas (I was unfortunately unable to spot my house!). The school forest is really wonderful- it’s right next to the infamous Monteverde Reserve- but without all the tourists! Once we got back to the classroom, I spent the rest of the day and most of the week helping out small groups of students and getting to know them during snack and lunch. There are fifteen students in my class- four boys and eleven girls- and they all seem incredibly sweet and most of them appear to love school. I’m really looking forward to getting to know them each individually, learning about their different interests and learning styles.

All the interns eased into our time at the CEC with a short week; Friday was a “staff event day,” so we went on the CEC trip… to the beach! It was quite the experience. All school staff and their families were invited, so we all loaded onto a school bus early Friday morning, equipped with food, musical instruments, and games, and headed down to Puntarenas. We went to a really nice park and pretty much took over (it wasn’t to busy since it was during the week). We spent the day swimming, relaxing, playing football, grilling, and eating. It was a great opportunity for my to get to know some of the other people who work at the school in a relaxed environment (though I wouldn’t exactly call the CEC work environment an up-tight or high-stress one anyway). I spent the rest of the weekend with the rest of the interns hiking in the Monteverde Reserve and house sitting for one of the CEC teachers. It was fun to spend a night on our own- we got to cook a delicious dinner of fresh veggies and pasta from the weekly feria (like a farmer’s market). I ran into my family in Santa Elena as I was walking home on Sunday and we ended up going out to lunch (my first meal in a restaurant since I’ve been here!) to a place called the Krusty Krab. I found the SpongeBob reference quite comical. It was a lot of fun to spend the afternoon with them!

I’m now into my second week at the CEC, and I’m slowly integrating into the class and gaining more responsibilities. Like yesterday, for Valentine’s Day, I got to lead an art project where we made little mailboxes so we could deliver everyone’s Valentine’s. I also got to teach a little grammar lesson to a group of students. I’m definitely still very nervous about the prospect of teaching, especially in front of a whole class, but I have faith that things will become a lot more comfortable as I spend more time in the classroom and continue to get to know the students. Also, I am so lucky to be with Beverly. She’s a fantastic teaching model and has already been so helpful and interesting to talk to. I’ve already figured out that second grade is younger than I actually want to teach (I pretty much already knew this), but Beverly has actually taught at all elementary school levels, so I’ve been getting some good insights from her. I’ll save a good, full reflection on the school for another time, though. I’ve been thinking a lot about a lot of things in terms of the culture of the school, managing a classroom, and learning and schooling in general- way to much to get into now! At the very least, the CEC seems like a really special place for students, parents, and teachers alike and I’m excited to learn more about it!

Aside from the prospect of spending the next four months in a classroom and getting to learn so much about teaching, I think the most exciting advancement for me has been fiiinally cooking with Dixia! I knew my insistence to do the dishes every night and to just hang around in the kitchen while she was cooking would pay off! I have worked my way up the ladder ☺ A proud moment was last week when she asked me what vegetables she should get from the store so we could cook meals this week. I’ve now gotten into the routine of joining her in the kitchen right when I get home from school in the evening, so we get to spend a bunch of hours cooking, cleaning, and talking. This is a great time for us to share recipes, and we’ve been having a lot of conversations about healthy and local food. I am so thankful for this time I get to spend with her; it’s been infinitely helpful in getting us to develop a strong relationship and it’s a great opportunity for me to practice Spanish. It’s to the point now where, when she introduces me to other people, she says I am her oldest daughter (which often receives some strange looks because we clearly have very different backgrounds haha)! The other night, after Angelica and I had made a carrot-pineapple cake to celebrate Valentine’s Day, Dixia said to me, “You’re not allowed to go back to the States. You need to find yourself a Costa Rican boyfriend so you’ll move down here and cook with me all the time!” Not only does that truly made me feel like a part of the family, but it really solidifies with me how humble of a person Dixia is. I wish I could paint for you a perfect picture of this woman. She never stops working, but she also always has a smile on her face and the heartiest laugh. And she is talking to me as if I have all the things in the world to teach her cooking-wise, when in fact it is quite the opposite! I feel as though every moment I spend with this family reminds me of how lucky I am to be here with them. I couldn’t have asked for a better homestay!

***

Though so much has happened and changed since I arrived, it’s kind of hard to believe I’ve been here for a month and a half already. At Swarthmore, we often talk about the feeling of time warp, where everything simultaneously feels like it’s just started and also like it’s been going on forever. I remember after only a week of being here, I felt so comfortable and in place that it seems like being back in Connecticut was just a distant memory. Now it’s strange to think that I’m already one quarter through my time here!

When I compare how I feel now, though, and how I felt that first day I arrived here, I can easily see how much has changed in the time that has passed. Not only is there the obvious improvement of my language skills, but also the accompanied integration into my family. I am so happy to be past the times when I used to write down everything I wanted to say and read to people from my notebook! It’s way more fun to have spontaneous conversations haha :) I also feel infinitely more comfortable with being on my own, in a place where I clearly don’t fit in appearance-wise. On that note- I think one of my biggest frustrations of being here is the fact that many people can peg me as being an American and, as a result, often automatically use English, even if I start to speak to them in Spanish. Though, I guess an even bigger frustration of mine would be the people here who perpetuate the stereotype of the ignorant American traveler and only speak in English. Yes, Monteverde is a very touristy place, but that does not change the fact that you are in a Spanish-speaking country and that you should not always assume English to be the common or correct language for communication!! At least make an effort to use a little bit of Spanish!! With that said, though, I will restrain myself from venting more.

Back to the point, which is that every day I am falling more in love with Costa Rica and all the people I’ve been lucky enough to meet. I can’t really pinpoint what it feels like to be here, because it just feels so natural. All I know if that I am really enjoying it here, and I am so very excited for my next four months of learning the ins and outs of teaching. Since I consider myself to be pretty much obsessed with all things education-related, I can’t imagine a better way to spend my semester!

I’m sending everyone my best! I hope all is well in your respective parts of the world! <3

p.s. I added a bunch of new photos, so be sure to check them out! :)

This is a Costa Rican saying I learned in class one day last week. It translates to “Practice makes the teacher,” and it came up in a conversation about how the best and most meaningful learning comes though practice and experience. This is something I have always believed in and hope to use as a driving force in my teaching in the future, but I’ve been realizing its truth here beyond academic settings more and more every day. A clear example would be how quickly I’m coming to be able to communicate with my family in Spanish; practicing all day every day definitely does the trick for learning a language! I’ve also learned that being with people is the main way I pass my time. It’s been strange here not having a stable group of friends, since people come to and go from CPI every week and the other CEC interns don’t arrive for another two weeks. I’ve been able to befriend people to go on hikes and things, but it’s odd to know how temporary it is. I’ve realized I’m not one to want to go exploring on my own, because the part of exploring that is fun for me is sharing it with other people.

Another not exactly direct example comes from a conversation I had last week with my afternoon Spanish teacher, José. We were talking about the importance of family in both of our lives and up came the topic of homesickness. He had a lot of really interesting things to say about it, and we ended up having a conversation that gave me a completely new perspective on this experience of being in a new place by myself. Basically: It is a beautiful thing to feel homesick because that feeling of missing is proof of how much you love your family and friends and how important they are to you. It proves to you your ties to the places and people that make you who you are, and it shows you the strength of these ties, pulling at you even from afar. I was walking home after this conversation and stopped to check out this Macrobiotics store, which sells some pottery (from an artist who is all about recycled materials and ceramics, and for whom I might be volunteering in the future…), natural medicines, and natural peanut butter (!!). Outside, there was a sign expressing “Tips for Beauty.” So applicable to my earlier conversation, the last tip read, translated, “For good posture, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.” So even though this experience of being away from home and most of what is familiar to me has been strange and uncomfortable at times (but overwhelmingly positive, exciting, and happy!), I feel like I’ve got a new perspective on any loneliness and homesickness I might feel. I’ve been missing you all terribly, and I’ve so appreciated all the Skype conversation and emails you’ve all sent to check up on me and let me know what’s going on in your lives. Keep them coming!

Now for some highlights from my past two weeks:

• I met Beverly, the teacher I’ll be working under at the CEC. The fact that I’ll be in a classroom teaching in just a few weeks is becoming more and more real (and nerve-racking) every day! It was so great to hear about the students, though, and some of the things we’ll be doing.
• My sisters started up school again, and now every night they ask for my help with their homework- fractions, writing, and vocabulary… I’m getting lots of good practice in! The benefits of being the “teacher” in the house? It’s also fun to be the big sister, a relationship I’ve always been on the other side of!
• Last weekend, I went into Monteverde with one of my classmates from CPI. We went to this place called CASEM, a cooperative that sells that artwork of local women; it’s an incredible place. We also went to the Monteverde Cheese Factory, which was established by the Quakers when they came to Monteverde in the 1950s (I’ll hopefully be writing a post about the history of the area in the future, because it’s really interesting!) It was fun to see where almost all of Costa Rica’s cheese is produced, and of course to taste it :) 
• Last week, I introduced a new recipe to Dixia- “Tortas de Frijoles Negros con Vegetales” (black bean burgers). It was fun to teach her how to cook them, and they were a big hit with my family!! I’m hoping now to learn some of her recipes…  
• Speaking of food, which I have surprisingly failed to talk much about until now and a topic to which I still will not do justice (Colonnese/Manteiga family and fellow fat kids, you know how important food is), it’s GREAT here. Dixia is an incredible cook; she is so creative with beans and veggies. Also the bananas are delicious. 
• This past weekend, I went to La Catarata de San Luis with two friends from CPI. It was about a 14 km hike from Santa Elena and we had a perfect day for it. Along the way, we stopped at this guy’s art gallery, where he also had a huge collection of local miniature orchids, which were beautiful and incredibly small (we didn’t even realize they were in bloom until he started talking to us about them!). We had a picnic lunch on the rocks around the waterfall (pictures are coming) and then called a taxi to bring us back to Monteverde because we couldn’t hack a four-hour walk back up the mountain to town…
  
• I just had a great conversation about vegetarianism with my afternoon Spanish teacher. She is the first person here who hasn’t look at me like I’m insane for not eating meat- because she is a vegetarian too! The first one I’ve met here (they are few and far between). I have seriously been so lucky with all of my afternoon conversation teachers- we always seem to have so much in common, making conversations incredibly fun and interesting. It’s pretty much to the point where, instead of taking notes on Spanish words and grammar rules, I’m recording the ideas and theories and stories we’re sharing with each other!
  

Aside from getting to see all of these incredible places and meeting people from all over, one of the biggest highlights (and frustrations) of my time here so far has been learning Spanish. Overlooking the struggles and fact that every time I learn one thing, I realize ten other things I have no idea how to say, I love the tangibility of my gradually increasing language skills. One of the best parts of it is, as I can speak more and more, I’m also growing more comfortable here. Yesterday morning, I had a conversation with Dixia about how I’m feeling about the change to being here. When I asked her a similar question, how she feels about the change of having me in the house, she said, “It’s always good to have more family around.” This place is feeling more and more like a home to me every day. I seriously can’t say enough how lucky I am to be with such an incredible family here! Coming from a really close and loving family of my own, it feels amazing to be building similar relationships here.

I hope all is well with everyone! And to those of you who are at Swat, I hope the first week back was fun!

Lots and lots of love <3

p.s. I promise in the future I’ll try not to write such novels! I’ve never really been one for concise writing…

My trip to Costa Rica started on Sunday morning. After a really hard "see you later" to my parents (which was preceded by many, many hard "hasta luegos" to the rest of my family and friends- I miss you all a ton!!), I got on my plane and was on my way. After seeing a beautiful sunrise from thousands of feet in the air (a wonderful way to start this trip), I slept pretty much the whole flight. I landed in San Jose at around one in the afternoon and met up with a father from the CEC, who drove me the three hours to Monteverde. After the long ride, I met my host family, watched some bull riding on TV, had dinner, and went to sleep EARLY. My feelings that afternoon/night included: absolute amazement of the beautiful countryside and forests I was driving by, extreme tiredness, a bit of discomfort about embarking on this journey by myself, homesickness, and immense guilt for not knowing Spanish and thus not really being able to talk much with my family at first. I knew I had to be patient, though, and things would get better in the language and comfort departments. Sure enough, speaking from a week later, they have!

My classes at CPI started on Monday morning. To help me get my bearings of the area, my host father took me to school on his moto- quite a fun experience on these bumpy dirt roads! Since then, I’ve been walking the forty-five, very hilly (but beautiful and enjoyable) minutes to and from school. My house is in Cañitas, which is the beginning of the countryside of Monteverde, beyond my house are a ton of farms (which I’ll be talking about later) and the houses are very spread out. Walking towards CPI, I go past the road that goes up the mountain where CEC is located and through Santa Elena, a small town, mostly overrun by touristy restaurants, shops, and cafes. About thirty minutes past CPI is the reserve for which Monteverde is so famous. I’m sorry if that is a confusing explanation! It’s a bit difficult to put into words- I’ll be posting some pictures on my blog for sure!

Anyhow, last week at CPI, I met a slew of people from all over the US who were also taking classes. From eight to noon, last week, I was in a class with Jana and Peter, a couple from California who also knew no Spanish. It turns out our teacher, Isaura, is the Spanish as a second language teacher at the CEC, so that was really nice to already develop a connection with the school! The morning classes are focused mostly on grammar and vocab, kind of the nuts and bolts of the language taught though a lot of conversation and fun exercises and games. This week (our classes change every week because people come to study for all different lengths of time), I’m in a class with a girl named Stephani, who works on an organic farm in Arizona. She used to be a vegetarian, she speaks French, she has only been studying Spanish for one week (at one of CPI’s other locations), and she loves all things outdoors and garden related. I swear it’s like we’re long lost friends of something! Also, our teacher really likes all things garden and outdoors related. So, I’m really excited for classes this week. Yesterday we spent a lot of class talking about gardening, organic food, and the plague of factory farms and over-processing that is the dominant source of food in America. Today we talked about urban gardening, food access, and health issues. What better way to learn Spanish than through talking about topics I’m really interested in?!

After an hour lunch break, I have an hour and a half more of class, one-on-one with the teacher. We just get started on talking about something, like how I play field hockey or what I’m going to be doing at the CEC, and I struggle through my explanations with my dictionary, verb sheets, and lots of “Cómo se dice…” to my teacher. The hardest day was when I was telling my teacher about some summer jobs I’ve had- both camps where I taught tennis, one in relatively affluent Eason, CT and the other in inner-city Bridgeport, CT. I was essentially trying to talk with her about the socioeconomic difference that exist in the US, which was a draining and frustrating experience because not only are these difficult things to talk about in English, but I had to water down what I was saying so much in order to be able to explain it in Spanish! But, I really like the model of teaching at CPI- I learn by talking about things that are important to me. Like yesterday, I spent the whole afternoon talking about education and the achievement gap and learning about the Costa Rican education system. Today, I talked about environmental issues in the States, ecotourism in Costa Rica, and the issue of greenwashing (when products are marketed as being environmentally friendly, when, in practice, they aren’t). How amazing is that?? I’m also happy to say that my use of the dictionary and referencing my notes has significantly decreased!

It’s really incredible to me how quickly you can learn a language when you’re immersed in it. I definitely had the benefit of knowing a good amount of French before coming here, which helped out a TON (and was also frustrating when things come out in the wrong language), but I can now speak and understand what I think is a relatively good amount of Spanish for only having been here for just over a week! I’m excited to see where I am after six months!

Thanks to the Spanish I’m learning and getting to practice every day, I have been growing closer and closer to my incredible family here. I have two sisters, Alejandra, who is ten, and Angelica, who is eleven, my mom, Dixia, and my dad, Geovanny. They have been nothing but patient and welcoming with me, and it is so nice to slowly feel as though I am becoming a part of the family. I think we were all shy with each other at first, understandably, but now my sisters are at the point where they will come into my room and tell me to stop doing my homework so I can play with them, Dixia will make fun of me, and Geovanny will follow me on his moto on a rainy day and tell me he can’t let me walk to school because it’s too cold out and insist on giving me a ride. I’ve gotten to the point where I was dishes, help fold laundry, and just sit around and talk with them (a great way to practice my Spanish!). Also, Dixia is a wonderful cook, and I’m excited to be able to learn some of the delicious things she makes and to help her in the kitchen. This morning she asked me what my favorite things to cook are, and I think I’ll be making my black bean burgers for them sometime this week! I wish I could express to them how happy and thankful I am to have them bring me into their family so fully and welcomed.

This Saturday, Dixia, Alejandra, and Angleica gave me a full tour of the CEC. We had to install two beautiful cabinets Geovanny had made for a lunch/recreation room. Since Dixia works at the school, she has keys to all the buildings; she opened up every room for me and told me about each class and teacher and interesting facts about the school. I will be uploading some pictures soon- the view from the school, at the top of a mountain and with quite a few acres of rainforest on its property, is incredible. You can see some towns, mountains- endless green-, the Nicoya gulf, and more of Costa Rica in the distance. I could actually sit there and look at it all day- and this is where I get to work! It was generally just a fun morning of bonding with my sisters (we danced to Beyonce, played tag, and went on a walk in the woods), and getting to know where I’ll be for the next four months.

Afterwards, I went ziplining with a group of volunteers from Oberlin who are at the CEC for three weeks working on some outdoor maintenance, probably my one and only blatantly touristy adventure for this trip. It was fun ziplining through the gorgeous forest. I even did the Tarzan drop, which was a thirty meter drop followed by huge pendulum swinging back and forth. Overall, it was enjoyable and exciting, but it just proved to me that I’m not all that interested in those extreme touristy adventures!

On Sunday, Dixia, Alejandra, Angelica and I went to visit Dixia’s abuela’s farm, about a two hour walk from Cañitas. We left really early in the morning since it was so far. The countryside is beyond beautiful. I wish I could transport each of you here to see it. I took some pictures that I’ll send around soon, but they do not do it any justice (which I’ve been finding to be true of all the pictures I’ve been taking!). After the walk up and down and through the mountains on an endless dirt road, we arrived at the farm, surrounded by pastures, cows, horses (I couldn’t get any good pictures for you, Jen!), coffee plants, and a ton of different vegetables. I mostly just sat around with my sisters and played with a three-month-old baby while Dixia visited with her family. After lunch time, they all decided they wanted to go visit Dixia’s other grandparents, so we all piled into one of her cousin’s pick up trucks (Alejandra, Angelica, and I got to ride the whole way in the truck bed- SO fun), and embarked on the hour long drive back on the path we had walked and even further into the countryside.

Once at the other farm, everyone just sat around and talked and visited. I mostly just sat in the corner- I was exhausted because it had already been a long day and it is SO tiring to constantly be trying to figure out what people around me are talking about. Also, I think any feelings of homesickness that had been kind of pushed aside throughout the week by my business with classes and homework came flooding onto me. Since I couldn’t hold any meaningful conversations with anyone, I had all the time to think. Everyone was visiting and having a great time together, and all I wanted was to have my family and friends with me too. Also, it was strange to me that nobody really introduced themselves to me or questioned why I was there, and when they did they didn’t both to try to talk to me because my Spanish is still so relatively minimal. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people talk about me through other people, rather than talking to me when they’re able to (I could understand everything they were questioning and saying about me, and I could have easily explained it myself!). Then again, this was probably primarily my fault because I didn’t make the hugest effort to put myself out there, as I felt kind of strange and intrusive being a part of this big family reunion. Things got better, though, when I decided to sit down at the table with Dixia’s abuelo and cousin and I talked with them for a bit. I spent the rest of the time relaxing with Dixia, watching the sunset, and reading. Around seven thirty, we rode back to Cañitas in the truck; I went to bed soon after we returned. Despite the emotional bump in the middle and not having anyone to decompress about it with, it was all in all a good day and I got to see a beautiful part of the country.

Needless to say, I am having an incredible time in Costa Rica so far. The weather this weekend and so far this week has been particularly amazing. January is the transition period between the rainy and dry seasons, so, like all of last week, it is often very rainy and windy (which actually isn’t totally bad- rain here is a fun but heavy mist, and there are always multiple rainbows in sight), but it has been clear and sunny the past few days! Every day I can feel myself becoming more and more accustomed to my life here and with my family. Now that I’m pretty much settled in, it feels so comfortable and natural to be here. Plus, learning Spanish in this environment is so fun and rewarding. No matter how tired I am after classes and constantly trying to understand what is happening around me, the end of every day feels so good because I can actually feel and hear my language skills improving, and because I’m so lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful people. My sisters, who both speak English because they go to the CEC, keep telling me how impressed they are by how little they have to translate for me at home now! I really, really love this place and am beyond excited to have over five more months ahead of me!!!